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>(from the web...)
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>IBM, A Company Full Of Solutions 
>KABINDA, ZAIRE-- 
>
>In a move IBM officials are hailing as a major step in the company's 
>ongoing worldwide telecommunications revolution, M'wana Ndeti, a member 
>of Zaire's Bantu tribe, used an IBM global uplink network modem yesterday
>to crush a nut. 
>
>Ndeti, who spent 20 minutes trying to open the nut by hand, easily 
>cracked it open by smashing it repeatedly with the powerful modem. "I 
>could not crush the nut by myself," said the 47-year-old Ndeti, who added
>the savory nut to a thick, peanut-based soup minutes later. "With IBM's 
>help, I was able to break it." 
>
>Ndeti discovered the nut-breaking, 28.8 V.34 modem yesterday, when IBM 
>was shooting a commercial in his southwestern Zaire village. During a 
>break in shooting, which shows African villagers eagerly teleconferencing
>via computer with Japanese schoolchildren, Ndeti snuck onto the set and 
>took the modem, which he believed would serve well as a "smashing" 
>utensil. 
>
>IBM officials were not surprised the longtime computer giant was able to
>provide Ndeti with practical solutions to his everyday problems. "Our 
>telecommunications systems offer people all over the world global 
>networking solutions that fit their specific needs," said Herbert Ross, 
>IBM's director of marketing. "Whether you're a nun cloistered in an 
>Italian abbey or an Aborigine in Australia's Great Sandy Desert, IBM has 
>the ideas to get you where you want to go today." 
>
>According to Ndeti, of the modem's many powerful features, most 
>impressive was its hard plastic casing, which easily sustained several 
>minutes of vigorous pounding against a large stone. "I put the nut on a 
>rock, and I hit it with the modem," Ndeti said. "The modem did not break.
>It is a good modem." 
>
>Ndeti was so impressed with the modem that he purchased a new, 
>state-of-the-art IBM workstation, complete with a PowerPC 601 
>microprocessor, a quad-speed internal CD-ROM drive and three 16-bit 
>ethernet networking connectors. The tribesman has already made good use 
>of the computer system, fashioning a gazelle trap out of its wires, a 
>boat anchor out of the monitor and a crude but effective weapon from its 
>mouse. 
>
>"This is a good computer," said Ndeti, carving up a just-captured 
>gazelle with the computer's flat, sharp internal processing device. "I am
>using every part of it. I will cook this gazelle on the keyboard." Hours 
>later, Ndeti capped off his delicious gazelle dinner by smoking the 
>computer's 200-page owner's manual. 
>
>IBM spokespeople praised Ndeti's choice of computers. "We are pleased 
>that the Bantu people are turning to IBM for their business needs," said 
>company CEO William Allaire. "From Kansas City to Kinshasa, IBM is 
>bringing the world closer together. Our cutting-edge technology is truly 
>creating a global village." The Bantu tribesmen are members of an 
>ever-growing, international community of users who have turned to IBM to 
>solve their networking needs. 
>
>Jean-Claude DuMont, a goatherder from the French region of Brittany who 
>is working on an Indiana University Ph.D. in biology via internet, 
>recently looked into IBM's new computer-satellite data uplink, which 
>offers instant access to all library files worldwide. "With IBM's new 
>uplink service, I can access any file I want, any time I want," DuMont 
>told fellow goatherder Pierre Valmont during a recent walk through a rye 
>field. "I can even find out how many points Michael Jordan scored last 
>night." Responded Valmont: 
>
>"Radical." 
> =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
> Michael D. Edwards                 GTEnet: (409) 862-2772 -=- fax: 862-2307
> The Training Center                          WWW: http://acs.tamu.edu/~mike
> Computing and Information Services             Internet: m-edwards@tamu.edu
> Texas A & M University                             SNEAKERnet: B013D Teague
>
>